i am his mama

Today's prompt on Blogtember is:

Describe a distinct moment when your life took a turn.

 

There have been many moments when my life as I knew it took a turn:

moving across countries and to different continents, 

marrying my best friend, 

quitting teachers college to study Journalism and deciding that wasn't what I wanted either, 

the day we found out we would need fertility treatments to fulfill our dream of becoming parents,

a positive pregnancy test,

a miscarriage,

and that second positive pregnancy test.

All moments that changed my life and made me the person I am today.

But the most life changing moment has got to be the birth of our son.

Nothing could prepare me for the all consuming love I would feel for this little man, 

or for the fear of losing him, 

for the joy when he wakes up in the morning, because that means I can hug him again, 

for the the heart bursting pride I feel when I see my husband play with our son,

for the gratefulness I feel that I am his mama.

From the moment he was born my life as I knew it had changed, it took a turn for the better and changed it for good.

Love, Maria

five things for friday

one.

Micha is súch a boy. He is obsessed with cars and buses and loud machines. So imagine his excitement when we woke up to this the other day:

He was in heaven, he kept pointing and exclaiming. It was so cute. 

Less cute was all the noise that comes with machines like this.

The roof of our apartment building was being fixed and, boy, am I glad they're done!

two.

Remember when I posted a photo of Micha every week? All fifty-two weeks of his first year.

For this year I was planning to do monthly photo's, no biggie right, after doing weekly ones for a year?

Uhm, well, I guess doing things on a weekly basis helps you to keep up. 

So here is Micha's 13 month photo about a week over due:

three.

I found four of these chairs at the thrift store last week for thirty euros. 

Thirty euros for the whole set to be exact. 

I was so excited to find them as I've been looking for these exact chairs for a while now. 

I can't believe my luck! I'm planning on painting them white and adding a fun accent like this:

source

but in these colors:

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I can't wait to show you the results!

four.

this post on marriage is so good. 

five.

A new blog I discovered and one of their recipes I'm making this weekend:

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Happy Weekend!

Love, Maria

letting go

Day 3 of Blogtember.

Today's prompt is:  Pass on some useful advice or information you learned and always remembered.

source

 

I've always been pretty sensitive person with a high sense of empathy for others. 

I'm usually well aware of others and their feelings. 

I see that as a positive trait. It is something that adds to my personality and makes me who I am.

But sometimes that trait can be a burden and turn into something negative.

A few years ago I had a few counseling sessions with psychologist, 

I was going through a difficult time in my life, including our infertility struggles and I just needed someone professional to talk too. 

It was quite a step to seek help but I'm so glad I did, and would recommend it to anyone going through issues, small or big. *first piece of advice right there :) 

One of the most important things I learned about myself during our talks was that I tend to think for others. 

'He'll be disappointed in me' 

'They'll think I'm a failure because I didn't finish university' 

'She has so many friends, she doesn't need me'.  

Those were thoughts I had on a daily basis, and they were lies I was telling myself.

Lies to protect myself, excuses for not letting myself to be vulnerable, thoughts that were crippling me and holding me back.

The advice my counselor gave me was so simple. 

Whenever I found myself thinking for others I needed to turn the situation around and ask myself: 

'Would I be disappointed in someone if they were in my shoes?' 

'Would I think someone is a failure because they didn't finish university' 

'Would I say no to a friend?' 

And the answer would always be 'no'. 

And even if someone would react like I feared, that would be something out of my control. 

That would be their issue, not mine.

I realized that I needed to let go of  those crippling thoughts and just live my life unafraid of vulnerability and not letting the fear of rejection (because that was what is was) hold me back. 

Because life is to short to live in fear.

What piece of advice have you always remembered?

Love, Maria

a dream

This month I'm participating with Jenni's Blogtember. It's the perfect way to challenge myself to write about topics I normally wouldn't write about and a fun way to meet  other bloggers.

 

Today's prompt was : 

If you could take three months off from your current life and do anything in the world, what would you do?

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I didn't have to think hard about this question. Not at all. 

Yes, I'd love to travel and visit my family and friends across the various ponds, 

but if I really was allowed to do anything in the world, just for me, 

I would would pack my bags, take a train to Paris and learn to be a pastry chef.

Yep, that would be it.

There's just something magical about baking and creating something out of a few ingredients. 

I find serenity in measuring out flour and sugar, chopping chocolate and folding in whipped egg whites.

I would love to become better at something I love to do.

I'm curious, what would you do, I you had the choice?

Love, Maria

a part of me

Today marks the start of Blogtember, a challenge to blog every weekday in September with the help of topics to write about. 

Everyone can join along, it will be fun!  Here are the topics and rules.

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Today's topic is: describe where or what you come from. The people, the places, and/or the factors that make up who you are.

Oma, around 1940-ish?

note: this is my version of her story, some facts may have occurred a bit differently than described.

My Oma, dads mother, was a strong woman with a remarkable story. 

She is an example of strong faith, making the best of what life hands to you and not giving up.

As an unmarried young woman in the late 1940's my Oma became pregnant. It was a scandal in the Dutch town of those days and her outraged family sent her to live with an aunt in England, where she learned to type and speak English, not knowing that it would come in handy in the years to come.

When the dust had settled she came back to Holland with her baby son where she met a man with five children who had lost his wife to an illness. 

They married and with that she became a respectable woman again and he had a mother for his motherless children, it was the perfect solution. A new life for her began.

Her new husband, my Opa, came from a family of fishermen, but in the early 1950's work was scarce and stories of new countries with many possibilities were surfacing. 

Like many Dutch families in those days, my Oma and her new family sold their belongings and made the voyage to Australia to seek a new life and better opportunities.

The start in their new country was rough. But after a few challenging years, in which they found their footing, life was good. 

Their big family grew bigger with more children, including my dad, they opened their very own grocery store, and my Oma was a useful asset between the Dutch community and the Australians with her typing skills and knowledge of the English language.

But then disaster struck. When my dad was nine years old, his dad, my Opa died. 

My Oma was left behind with his five children, six of hers (her first son and the five children Opa and Oma had together) and a grocery store.

But she didn't give up. She took care of her children and managed the grocery store and like she had learned from her life she made the best out of a bad situation.

Then one day while reading a church bulletin for the Dutch community she came across a story of a widower with children living in Canada. She wrote him a letter and they continued a correspondence. 

Through the letters they grew fond of each other and decided to get married.

And once again my Oma left an old life behind to start new one in a new country with a new husband and all of their children. 

She and my step-Opa added two children to their already large family, money was tight, 

but my Oma made do with what she had. 

She sewed clothing, baked her own bread, made her own jam (Oh, I remember that jam) and made sure her children were healthy and happy. And there was always room for an extra mouth at the table. 

My mom told me that when she first visited their house as my dads girlfriend that she thought she'd landed in a real life Laura Ingalls Wilder story. 

^ ^ ^ ^

My Oma died a few years ago, and in her last years she was suffering from Parkinson's' disease, the strong woman that she was, had faded a bit. 

She left ( I think) 19 children, step- and her own, and countless grand- and great-grandchildren behind. 

But more importantly she left behind her feisty spirit, her no nonsense attitude and her great example of trusting God and making the best of life. 

She wasn't perfect, my Oma, she could be tough, just ask my dad, but she was a woman with story, a woman who set a great example for her children and her childrens' children. 

A great example for me.

I'm grateful that she is a part of what makes me who I am.

Love, Maria

tabouleh

Today I want to share one of my very favorite recipes for dinner. 

It's seriously the easiest recipe known to mankind, well, at least to me.

It's a go-to recipe for picnics and birthdays. It's definitely a crowd-pleaser.

I love to bring it to new moms, because it's healthy and tasty and easy for them to grab a bowlful whenever they feel hungry.

It's good by itself for lunch or as dinner with some flat-bread and chicken wings.

I love to make it and I love to eat it!

^ ^ ^ ^

So here goes my own recipe for 'Tabouleh' or 'Couscous Salad' as I usually call it.

2 cups or 300 gr couscous

2 large tomatoes, diced

1 cucumber, seeded and diced

1 bunch of parsley, finely chopped

1 small bunch of mint, finely chopped (leave some pretty leaves for garnishing)

1 small red onion, finely chopped

handful of raisins

salt and pepper

2 tbsp olive oil

juice of 1 lemon

1 1/3 or 300 ml water

1 cup crumbled feta cheese

  

Mix everything together, except the feta cheese, in a large bowl 

(you'll want a big one as the couscous swells and grows in volume), 

cover and let sit in the refrigerator for at least an hour. 

Mix the crumbled feta through the salad and sprinkle some on top with some extra mint leaves and a drizzle of olive oil.

Bam. Dinner's ready. Enjoy!

So easy. So good.

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Happy Friday! Are you stoked for the weekend? I am! 

We're going to visit my parents who are in back Holland currently. Yay!

Love, Maria

bundling up for fall

It's not even September yet and the weather is still pretty nice, but something inside of me is stirring. 

Something that's looking forward to cooler weather and bundling up. 

It's so strange, I've never in my life looked forward to fall, but this year I do.

It might be all the fall outfits I've seen floating around on Pinterest 

or the fact that candy for Sinterklaas ( a holiday similar to secular Christmas, you know with Santa Claus and all) is already lining shelves in some stores. 

It might be the knowledge that my parents will be living here in Holland again in November(yay!),  or maybe it's just the excitement to show Micha a new season. 

I mean, he obviously has experienced fall before, but only as a wee little baby. 

I can't wait to show him the fun of running though a pile of crunchy leaves and maybe letting him have his first sip of hot chocolate.

So, what does one do when yearning for fall?

Look for fall outfits for the whole family of course!

Here are some of my fall faves from my favorite store H&M:

For her:

1

2

3

1,2,3

For him:

1

2

3

1,2,3 

For the little 'him':

1

2

 3

4

1,2,3,4

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So, tell me. Is it just me, or are you looking forward to fall as well? 

What are you looking forward to most?

Love, Maria